To know how to make a piece of writing better, we need to be able to identify what needs improving.
We'll be looking at a (not very!) creative short paragraph, and will explore the elements that aren't really working. We'll think about why the piece isn't working so that we understand how to improve it.
We'll take a look at what improvements could be made, how they affect the story and why they're a better choice.

We'll be taking a look at two edited versions of the extract to see how the piece improves.
Finally, we'll put the first draft back on the screen and the learner will have a go at writing their own improved version, putting into practice what we've identified and explored. 

Learners can submit their version to me for written feedback. 

There will be several places where the learner is asked to pause the video and work on a short challenge; which could be identifying areas for improvement, thinking about what they would like to see described, what senses they could use, etc.
Depending on how deeply the learner wants to explore these challenges, the class can be worked through in one sitting, or approached in shorter viewing sessions.